Tween a Rock and a Hard Place
by Songwind
Summary: Tama, Tasuki, Nuri and Mits sing a song that I think is suited to FY. ^^; It's a cute song, and if you get a chance listen to it! Plus the guys fit most of the singer's actual personalities. Please enjoy!


'Tween a Rock and a Hard Place  
  
By Songwind  
  
DISCLAIMER- I don't own FY or Floyd Collins.  
  
Author's Notes- Well, I've done it again, I wrote another songfic from the awesome yet depressing play called Floyd Collins. (Sees people starting to leave) No, wait! This is a funny song! Honest! Look! And please enjoy while you're at it, mmkay?  
  
Oh, and the time is sometime between volumes 4-6. Before Chiriko, after Mits and Tasuki.  
  
WARNING- Mits gets a tad outta character for the sake of the song. ^^;  
  
~*~  
  
(Tamahome, Tasuki, Mitsukake and Nuriko sit down at a table. Tasuki starts chugging some sake, Tamahome stares depressedly-ish at the wall, Mitsukake kind of sits there, and Nuriko sighs)  
  
Nuriko- Man, I'm so tired. When're we gonna get a break from all this fighting? (Leans on table)  
  
Tasuki- (snorts) Man, Miaka must'a done somethin' to really piss off Kutou!  
  
Mitsukake- She wouldn't have had to. They were bound to go to war with us anyway.  
  
Tasuki- Quiet, you! I'm tryin' to blame Miaka here! (smacks Mitsukake with tessen)  
  
Mits- (falls over)  
  
Nuriko- Well, we're going to have to protect Miaka no matter what, that's obvious. It's just she's got so many people after her now... (sighs) She was so brave to accept the role of Suzaku no miko, even if she didn't know what was gonna happen!  
  
(Song begins here)  
  
Tamahome- My love's in trouble, that's for sure,  
  
But I was in much worse 'fore I could shave!  
  
So don't talk to me 'bout brave!  
  
Others- (blink at him)  
  
I used to go in caves an' stuff,  
  
Back when I was scrawny enough  
  
To get down in there!  
  
Tasuki- (hollers) Ya got old an' fat!  
  
Tamahome- (hits him) Yeah thought I'd be a millionaire.  
  
Once when I was underground,  
  
I heard an awful sound  
  
Above my head.  
  
Thought for sure I was dead. Whoo!  
  
In a flash and like a flood,  
  
Boulders, rocks, and sand and mud  
  
Smashed me down!  
  
Mitsukake- I do declare!  
  
Tamahome- Uh-HUH! (Defiant look)  
  
I cussed an' screamed an' hollered an' swore,  
  
Gaw-damn I almost tore my arm off,  
  
To do it,  
  
But that's how you get through it!  
  
It weren't no picnic but by damn it was done!  
  
Nuriko- (pulls out fiddle and begins playing in the background)  
  
Tamahome- Tween a rock and a hard place,  
  
I been there plenty often,  
  
Tween a rock and a hard place,  
  
And I ain't in a coffin!  
  
You look death right in the face,  
  
The hardest for some folks to face...  
  
That's where I thrive,  
  
I'm still alive!  
  
At the reaper  
  
I'm a scoffin, I'm a scoffin... whoo...  
  
Tasuki- (sits and smacks him on the back while drinking some sake)  
  
Well now, Tama, I'm impressed!  
  
I didn't know ya was blessed   
  
Wit' such a fine imagination!  
  
Everyone else- (laughs while Tamahome glares and mutters about taking Tasuki for a swim)  
  
Tasuki- But I had a tougher situation.  
  
One day I'm sittin in Ma's boat,  
  
Fall asleep and I start t' float,  
  
Down the river...  
  
Everyone else- Aww...  
  
Tamahome- Like a baby in a cradle! ^^  
  
Everyone else- (laughs)  
  
Tasuki- Shut up!   
  
When I wake the water's white,  
  
It takes me all my might  
  
To keep it from flippin'!  
  
Round an' round she's a-whippin'.  
  
'Fore I even had time to blink,  
  
I found myself in th' drink,  
  
Cascadin' down to th' brink  
  
Of a waterfall!  
  
One hundred fifty-five foot tall!  
  
I thought if I'm goin' straight t' hell,  
  
Well oh Lord I may as well  
  
Enjoy it some!  
  
Everyone else- Whee hoo!  
  
Tasuki- Devil here I come!  
  
I say doo, doo, -doo- do-do-do-do-DO-DO!  
  
Everyone else- (repeat)  
  
Tasuki- Musta had a pretty good landin'  
  
Cause here I am 'fore ya standing  
  
Am I not? (Spreads hands)  
  
I'm tough as snot!  
  
Tasuki and Tamahome- It weren't no picnic but by damn it was done!  
  
Mitsukake- Gaw-damn, I was a soldier!  
  
Everyone else- O.o (Laugh at him) You weren't a soldier! You're a healer!  
  
Mits- Well, uh, in this fanfic I was, so shut up an' let me tell you something about death!  
  
Everyone else- Yeah, right... (See the author giving them death glares and shut up)  
  
Mitsukake- Nineteen hundred seventeen,   
  
met the Kutou they was mean,  
  
On the battlefield...  
  
Thought that it was sealed.  
  
Shot a hole clean through mah stomach,  
  
Weren't much left TO my stomach,  
  
They was dumb...  
  
Tasuki- (elbows Tama) Yeah right!  
  
Mitsukake- Thought they had the battle won!  
  
Couldn't move an inch,  
  
Couldn't get away,  
  
Guzzlin' like a pig on slaughter day  
  
Didn't look like no bouquet  
  
Of daffodils.  
  
Everyone- No sir!  
  
Mitsukake- But they was coming closer.  
  
With the last toll of the death bell,  
  
I blew those Kutou back t' hell  
  
Where they belonged!  
  
Everyone- WHEE HOO!  
  
Mitsukake- Correct me if I'm wrong!  
  
Everyone- It weren't no picnic but by damn it was done  
  
And by damn it was fun!  
  
Tamahome- Everybody now!  
  
Everyone- Tween a rock and a hard place,  
  
I been there plenty often,  
  
Tween a rock and a hard place,  
  
And I ain't in a coffin!  
  
You look death right in the face,  
  
The hardest for some folks to face...  
  
That's where I thrive,  
  
I'm still alive!  
  
At the reaper  
  
I'm a scoffin, I'm a scoffin  
  
At the reaper I'M A SCOFFIN'!  
  
WHOOOO!  
  
~*~  
  
Um... you want an explanation for this, I take it? ^^; I was bored? And this is one of my favorite songs from Floyd Collins?  
  
Seriously though, the main chars in both FY and FC are SO alike. Tamahome and Floyd both have money problems, care about their families, and are out looking for a way to remedy that problem. I can so picture Tamahome planning a get-rich idea by going caving. Thing is, Floyd's single and dies in the end. -_-  
  
Well ANYWAY, I hope you had fun reading this and I managed to bribe you into listening to Floyd Collins. Don't have to buy it or anything, just go and borrow it from the library. Especially one near or on a campus. They should have it. It's a great play! LISTEN TO IT, DAMN IT!  
  
O.o Okay... Well, hope you enjoyed everybody! (Waves) 


End file.
